Maybe it’s the weather, and the fact that I literally have really, really cold feet right now, despite owning about 500 pairs of slippers, but I’ve been thinking a lot about wedding nerves – and cold feet.
Now, I’m not talking about cold feet when it comes to your man – that’s a whole other issue and I happen to be very excited about the marriage part.
It’s the wedding bit that’s sort of freaking me out.
me, with very cold feet
As the big day edges closer and closer, I can’t help but think of what could have been. I’ve chosen a marquee wedding at my old school. But I could have had a barn… or a field… or a botanical garden… or a MOON WEDDING! OK, maybe not that last one, but you get my drift. While some women might be lamenting the fact that they’ll never sleep with anyone else again, I’m devastated by the fact that once I choose my flowers, that’s it! No more dreaming of elaborate arrangements, no more decisions to make.
Talking to my florist this morning I actually couldn’t choose. Not even the most basic things. I froze. This is the last decision I have to make. After that there’s no changes, no pinning, no scrapbooking… just… the wedding!
So naturally, I’ve started doubting ALL my choices. Everything from the dress to the overall concept. You name it, I’m suddenly horribly unsure.
I’d like to have my cake and eat it. OK, I’d like to have my cake, and then have another five cakes. And weddings. Yes, I’m very greedy.
I’m sure I’m not alone out there – as the date creeps ever nearer, decisions are suddenly final, invites are in the post and there’s no going back with my choices. I can’t help but wonder about the hundreds of other wedding scenarios that never were.
So, if you’re anything like me and you’re feeling the sting of difficult decision-making, here are a few tips:
♥ Trust your instincts. There’s a reason you chose the wedding you chose, don’t overthink it. Just know that when you were in a more decisive frame of mind, you probably made a good decision.
♥ Don’t cancel on suppliers unless there’s a really good reason. Not only will you use up a load of your budget, but it’s just rude. They must have been pretty good for you to book them in the first place, so don’t doubt yourself.
♥ Don’t stagnate. Keep the momentum going with your wedding. If you have DIY projects on the go, keep them up whenever you have time – if you have planning to do, do it regularly. That way you won’t have time to worry about the decisions you’re making.
♥ Remember why you’re getting married. Even if you’re not sure about all of your choices, the important bit is the marriage part. Focus on that and everything else will pale in comparison.
♥ Visualise it all coming together. Make a Pinterest board or a scrapbook with everything you’ve chosen and it will be a lot easier to see how your choices complement each other.
Are you having second thoughts about any of your choices? Have you bought more than one dress or booked more than one supplier as a result? What’s your wedding theme and is it what you wanted? Leave a comment below.
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Hee hee, love the photo!
Haha thanks – I was project managing, as you can see
xx
ha ha ha this is why im increasingly thinking i can NEVER get married!! the more i photograph and the more blogs i read (its all YOUR fault ;P lol) the more i want EVERYTHING!! hahaha and then i have to remind my self …. that A) im not engaged yet, B) it should be about the ceremony and the meaning and C) i suppose (haha) i have to take into consideration what my partner might want or not want and probably more importantly what we can afford …… but then i forget all of those points as soon i see something pretty or unique or inspiring hehehe and i am quite honest already that i am probably going to be a total nightmare when it comes to the photography
hahaha
…….. see !! the easiest thing would be just to not get married!!
I feel for you!!
xx
This comment put a big fat smile on my face! Choosing the right groom is always a good place to start…
xxxxx
hehehe well yes and that too
– i think i might have decided on that small detail already though! 
and having done so many weddings it makes you look at everything so critically in terms of light and what works etc ….. and quite honestly i think your blog was the first i found (i dont remember how or why?) which led to finding other blogs and twitterers and im now almost at the point of obsession 
….. although i think in a good way too – for work purposes mostly ……. (yea right!) tee hehe xx
I guess being a photog im always thinking about the photo ….. unfortunately
I have serious wedding envy!! All my decisions have been made and completed, was still the best day ever though and the most important thing was the sentiment of our day. So emotional
XxX
I know exactly what you mean!!
I think because I am a bride who hasn’t done alot of DIY for my wedding, not because I didnt want to but because I am totally untalented in that department!
I feel that I have made all my decisions, choices and that everything is just waiting to be delivered to me nearer the time, all the colours have been picked and the decoration. So now when I see something else or think, maybe we should have that too, I have to run it by Mr.S who 9/10 time will tell me to stop being a crazy bridezilla and will reassure me that everything we have planned is perfect and that I am panicking for no reason!
Though I have been banned from looking at dresses all together after a recent spate of dress wobbles!
A friend of a friend bought FIVE dresses. Yes, FIVE!!! That’s indecision to the extreme
xx
On the day I can assure you the ONLY thing that will matter is at the end of it you will be married to the love of your life! Even once all your decisions have been made, you will still see things that you think ‘oh, I wish I’d had that’ (especially being a blogger when you see a thousand new ideas every day!) but just rememember everything you have already chosen you have chosen for a reason! And if you really do want to do it all differently there’s always an annual vow renewal
xo
An annual vow renewal… now there’s an idea… xxx
This was my problem. I wanted it all, I wanted vintage, retro, geeky, green, coral, grey, lace, red, polka dot…. I just didn’t know what I wanted. So we made the decision together that none of the ‘stuff’ really mattered to us, so we cut the budget in half, cancelled the hotel booking (I didn’t even want a wedding in a hotel!) and I contacted the wedding planner again, who said we should focus ona what we think is most important; the ceremony. So we’re replanning, and can’t be happier! I’m not having a wedding for anyone else, or to keep up with fashion trends or so that I can have cute little table decorations, I’m getting married to the man I love, then we’ll celebrate. That is enough for us.
This is such good advice! I think everyone freaks out about these things – second guessing the choice of wedding dress seems to be the most common. You’re so right though – your instincts are usually right, and, as you say, the most important thing is that you’re marrying the person you love! (though if you start second guessing that one it might be time for a rethink…)